Monday, August 31, 2015

Kindergarten Eve

Tomorrow, Charlotte starts Kindergarten. To say I am a bit nervous is an understatement. I remember similar feelings four years ago when Katherine started Kindergarten, and two years ago when Will stepped on that bus. However, this time it is a little different, and the feelings are much more intensified.

I could list all my worries and concerns, many of which I hope will become completely unfounded, but really, what good will that do?

What I have tried to remind myself during the past week is the number of times in Charlotte's five short years on this earth I have laid awake worrying about her; whether is be surgeries or her health, meeting milestones, or her first day of preschool...and guess what? Most of my worrying, was completely unnecessary.

I also remind myself of what I know. She has a team of a spec ed teacher, three therapists, and an aide who are absolutely amazing and know her from 4K. A couple weeks ago, we met her new Kindergarten teacher who is equally awesome and I know is going to be a great fit for Charlotte. And while I worry about her be accepted by and fitting in with her peers, I remind myself how lucky Charlotte is to have older siblings, because we already know so many families in our community, and there will not be a shortage of familiar faces in the halls of her new school.

And then there is that dang bus. Oh, the bus, the source of most of my anxiety. From the day Charlotte was born, I vowed I would never limit her. I would never say she couldn't do something, until she let us know in some way it wasn't working. Charlotte will get on the regular ed bus tomorrow morning with her siblings. My head is racing with all the crazy things that can happen in her ten minute ride to and from school, but honestly, I need to let her try. Because, oh my goodness is she excited. All day today, and yesterday, and heck, all last week, she would randomly blurt out, "I'm so excited ride the bus!" And frankly, if worse comes to worse, I had a nice talk with Katherine tonight at bedtime about bribery... "if Charlotte refuses to sit in her seat, or lays on the floor and won't get up, just whisper in her ear that if she sits nice, she can have a BIG butter cup when she gets home" ...yep, I'm an awesome mom who not only resorts to bribery, but is teaching my almost 10-year-old my methods.

This afternoon, I was in the kitchen with the kids' backpacks lined up on the kitchen table, putting in last minute items. Charlotte was sitting in the living room playing her iPad. As I picked up the backpacks to bring them back to the mudroom, Charlotte looked up, did a little hip shimmy in her seat, and yelled "I'm so excited about school!" ...and then looked right back down and continued her game.

School ID makes it official ;-)

Lately, every time I tell Charlotte to "be careful!" or "watch what you are doing!" she answers with "I'll be fine, mom." ....Maybe I should listen to her...I am sure she is going to be fine...and I will too.