Dear Charlotte

Dear Charlotte,

On the eve of your first birthday, I wanted to write you in hopes of someday, when you are old enough, you will read this letter and understand what the past year with you has meant. No fancy pictures or videos, just a letter, explaining exactly how I feel.

I have struggled with the best way to put into words what I want to say. I could sit and reiterate every second of your birth and the days following it; however due to no fault of yours or mine (dang crappy hospital!), the only good thing that came out of the those few days was you. As I sit and recall exactly where I was a year ago, I can vividly remember every detail of those days. I try, when thinking about it, to concentrate on the feelings I had the first time I saw you and the excitement that me, your daddy, and your brother and sister felt when you were born. You were and always will be a welcome addition to our family, and it is so hard to imagine our lives without you in it.

I guess, the main purpose of this letter is to thank you. Thank you for being you. Thank you for opening my eyes to things I never knew existed. Thank you for making me a more compassionate, less judgmental, more patient person. Thank you for teaching me to slow down and enjoy every moment. 

It is amazing to me how you, one tiny human being, can have such an impact in only one year on this earth.  Imagine what you will do in the years to come? Keep it up my dear. Do what you do best; inspire others to be better people, and along the way, make sure to dream big and achieve all you desire.

Tomorrow, at 4:05PM you will be one.  One year, such a milestone in your little life. You did it my dear girl, you made it. Two surgeries, tons of doctors appointments, blood draws, therapy, and all the other crap that you have endured. You have handled it all with more determination and grace than most adults could have.

As I type this, I am watching you play with your brother on the floor next to me. I have tears in my eyes, as I reflect on this past year, and I have joy in my heart as I watch you climb all over your brother, both of you giggling. You have such a special relationship with Katherine and Will; I look forward to watching it grow in the years to come.

Yes my dear, your extra chromosome has and will bring some extra challenges to our lives. Fortunately, after this past year, I know that we can handle what ever challenges come our way....together. And though at times we may feel that life isn't fair and we shouldn't have to endure such hardship, we will quickly remind ourselves that it is all about prospective, and those tough times will pass. And when those times pass, the good times in our lives will seem all that more joyous.

Your brother just informed me that you need a diaper change (his nose is stellar!), and even though today is my birthday, neither of your siblings seem to want to attempt to change you for me, so I need to wrap this up :-).

Last year I received the best birthday gift....you, the gift never stops giving. Thank you baby girl, thank you.

I love you,
Mommy